Barge Dad and Julia Discuss the Finer Points of Religion

Me: You look beautiful this morning. I like your Pumpkin shirt. You know the Halloween Walk is tomorrow.

Julia: I’m going, but it’s for children.

Me: You’re eight. You are children.

Julia: I’m more like 18. I’m only going for the candy. I’m an adult.

Me: Then I have to tell you that you’re grounded, I think your friends are a bad influence, and you will absolutely never do that thing you did again.

Julia: That’s not fair. I’m a good girl and I rarely swear except sometimes I say “Fuck”.

Me: That’s a really bad word.

Julia:  I know and I only use it when I’m really angry at home, but it’s not as bad as “Goddammit” because that is taking the Lord’s name in vain.

Me: Drop the F word in church and see how far that gets you.

Wife: Julia, what are you doing?! We’re going to be late for school!

Me: We’re just discussing the finer points of theology.

Mina: Did you tell Daddy that you memorized all your prayers?

Julia: I did. And I got an award.

Mina: Let’s go Julia! We’re going to be late!

Me: Don’t be in a hurry to grow up Julia.

Julia: Don’t be in a hurry to be a grumpy old man, dad.